Friday, November 30, 2007

So, I am not one of those women who go all girly and super baby obsessed. I dont think there is anything wrong with being that - its just not me. In fact, I wish it was me - cause I really think society expects that from you as a pregnant woman.

Anyhoo, just thought of this today. Its weird. I am happy, in fact I am super happy - but being a very practical person - I tend not to romanticize anything. I am the person who hates buying flowers on valentines day. I dont expect J to buy me flowers everyday or take walks with me in the moonlight. I dont. I dont crave it. I'd much rather take that walk by myself. Much rather buy those flowers for myself, if I wanted. It makes an interesting marriage as J is more of an romantic. This baby stuff is wonderful but its not the end all. It doesnt define me. It makes me happy but like a lot of women I know it doesnt complete me. Its weird. I wish I didnt feel this disconnected. But I cant change that. I can enjoy where I am and who I am. I just wish I was girly and bursting to buy baby clothes.

Partly, I think it is me wanting to get through the first 3 months. I think once that is done, I will become more 'pregnant'. But until that time - I need to be practical, I think.

4 comments:

Vi said...

Yep, that's the way to be! You've still got a lot of months to go mad and buy baby stuff!

JsTzznU said...

Oh girl you have no idea LOL.. right Vi!!!

laura b. said...

You do things your own way and in your own time...good for you!

Anonymous said...

vi, jstzznu - I think patience is a gift I have been bestowed! I feel calm...

laura - thanks!