(Image:www.nancydoran.com/2.html)A few months ago my MIL's priest called from India. He has never done this so it was a big deal. He called to say that me and my SIL's should fast on particular days to avoid a catastrophe.
This practice is quite common in Hinduism (oh, how I hate that word). You are usually advised to fast to sacrifice - when the sacrifice is needed. SIL had to fast for herself - for good things to happen to her. I had to fast for J - something bad was going to happen to him and I had to fast to avoid that. You see my problem....? Being an ardent feminists I have always, always hated this aspect of my religion. If something is going to happen to me - I have to fast but if something is going to happen to my husband I have fast. WTF?
The other problem is this - there is, according to this priest, something bad in the future...bad enough to avoid it. However, if I fast - it can wholly be avoided. How can something that is bad enough, that it should be avoided, can be avoided by me not eating...? You see my logic?
Anyways - needless to say I had already decided I was not going to do it. Partly for the above noted reasons and partly for the fact that I have seen my mum do a billion fasts and never seen anything good come out of it. I decided not to do this. I did not tell my MIL cause, frankly, I don't think its any of her business. I simply said yes whenever she asked me if I would fast. No reason for her to know - besides she would never get what I am saying. I did tell J that this what his mum wanted me to do and this is what I was going to do - or not, in this case.
Fast forward a few months.....
I just found out that J has some liver problem. I don't think its drastic, its reversible, but needs care and attention.
You know where I am going, dont you?
It got me thinking - hey maybe I should have fasted. Totally, unreasonable demand but hey I could fulfil it....
Here is my problem - I still don't think my fasting has anything to do with J's liver. How can my not eating avoid anything........ but what if?
And its always the 'what ifs' in life that get you - right?
As I see it - I have a choice - I can follow that beaten path and make the necessary/ expected choices that will make me feel 'I did what I could...' OR I can find my way....
If you know me - you know I want to take the 'find my way' path - because I don't conform - but........
And there is always a but......
What do you think Violet (you in Sheffield) and Koolgurl (you in Bombay)...? [Hey, as a side note, I can change you nicknames - just let me know]
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